What is passion? Who defines what your passions are? Are they innate, woven into the cloth of our being before we are born? Or are they influenced by your parents? Maybe the world has some bearing on our passions?
I believe a combination of all these things influence our passions. There are time when people will tell you that your concerns are not vaild, or your cause is not worthy. Fight for it anyway. I will never stop fighting for a better world for my children. I intend to leave my little slice of Earth better than I found it. That means more than just choosing paper over plastic and limiting consumption. It means fighting for my views and ensuring that my voice is heard regarding the welfare of the children in my community. I will love all people; I will make people take notice of the fact that I am different. As a young person in Tennessee, I often find that my views differ from people older than me and from different backgrounds. That's ok; I respect their views. It is just so hard to listen and not interject when you are passionate about something. Why should you? If you truly believe something is right, should you not spread your passion?
School starts for me on Monday, and I go back to the old grind! I will try to update as much as possible... Go on out and conquer the world!
Potential: A Doule Edged Sword
A blog about real life when the cards are stacked against you
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
Bad Days
There are days when you feel like you can conquer the world-- like when you get done with your finals and all your grades have posted...that ahh feeling. And then there are days like today, days when there is never enough time. Caring for dad and the kids all day today was a handful. It was my "day off" from work, and my husband worked so it was all me. Those are long, draining days. My dad is an amputee, so he requires help bathing and using the restroom. So we get up, eat breakfast, give baths/showers, eat lunch, nap for kids, clean up house, dinner, and bed! It seems like every mouth is always hungry and waiting for me to fix a meal.
The reward for all this? Smiling faces and peace of mind knowing that everyone I love is cared for. At the end of days like this, I always think about mom and how she would have somehow made this all a little better, a little more bearable. I know that once school is over, a lot of financial stress will be gone. I long for that day, but I am really not sure if real life stress will ever go away.
Monday, August 11, 2014
Walking A Tight Rope....
After my mother's death, there were so many things that I realized I needed to know. My dad was at this point a sick man with diabetes and Congestive Heart Failure. I became his caretaker until school started in the Fall. I had a full ride to The University of Tennessee, but plans quickly changed. I realized I would need to stay closer to home, so I enrolled at UT Martin. Still about an hour from my dad, it was a burden I carried with me through my days at school. Nonetheless, I was an honor student during my time there. After a year away from home, I had to come to terms with the fact that my life would never be a fairy tale. I may never get to fulfill my potential. Dad's health was ailing and without me there, he was living in absolutely horrendous conditions.
I guess nothing in my life up until that point had prepared me for reality. Teachers had always doted on me, saying that I could do anything. I felt like a failure, to them and myself. Poverty had its grips on me from birth, and it wasn't letting go without a fight. Still, I refused to turn my back on my dad. He became my focus, and I went to work. It reminds me of an old song from my childhood, "Rich man goes to college, and a poor boy goes to work." Throughout this time, I felt a lot like I was wasting my life away waiting...but I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I made a lot of mistakes, which was something that as a poor, independent yound person, there wasn't much room for.
The three greatest blessings of my life came during the years that followed. First, my loving husband, then my beautiful son, and to round out our little family, a beautiful baby girl. If not for them, I would not have had the motivation or the courage to stand up and be counted--to reach my potential. During my pregnancy with my daughter, I enrolled in school at a nearby school, continued to work full-time, and made straight A's. I am currently enrolled in nursing school, and I have big plans for my life!
I guess the point of this blog is that life is not fair, you are never given a fair hand, and it's all about what you make of it. I would like to share my journey--my successes, my failures. I would also like to use this blog to look back on my past and try my best to learn from it. The main thing I have learned through my experience is that there is no time to sit and wait for your life to change, you have to get up and try to change it!
I guess nothing in my life up until that point had prepared me for reality. Teachers had always doted on me, saying that I could do anything. I felt like a failure, to them and myself. Poverty had its grips on me from birth, and it wasn't letting go without a fight. Still, I refused to turn my back on my dad. He became my focus, and I went to work. It reminds me of an old song from my childhood, "Rich man goes to college, and a poor boy goes to work." Throughout this time, I felt a lot like I was wasting my life away waiting...but I didn't even know what I was waiting for. I made a lot of mistakes, which was something that as a poor, independent yound person, there wasn't much room for.
The three greatest blessings of my life came during the years that followed. First, my loving husband, then my beautiful son, and to round out our little family, a beautiful baby girl. If not for them, I would not have had the motivation or the courage to stand up and be counted--to reach my potential. During my pregnancy with my daughter, I enrolled in school at a nearby school, continued to work full-time, and made straight A's. I am currently enrolled in nursing school, and I have big plans for my life!
I guess the point of this blog is that life is not fair, you are never given a fair hand, and it's all about what you make of it. I would like to share my journey--my successes, my failures. I would also like to use this blog to look back on my past and try my best to learn from it. The main thing I have learned through my experience is that there is no time to sit and wait for your life to change, you have to get up and try to change it!
Sunday, August 10, 2014
Life and Loss
What does poverty look like? Have you ever seen someone struggle to buy their children's school supplies or to afford shoes for school? Many times we are quick to point the finger at the parent and their shortcomings. Have you ever looked into that child's eyes and seen the absolute innocence behind them?
As a child of poverty, let me tell you that there were certainly things my parents could have done better to help me succeed. However, those things were out of my control. Even as an adult, the decisions of my parents haunt me, and I still often wonder if I will ever be able to escape the projects.
First, let me introduce myself. I am Amber Wortham Reece, a 24-year-old mother, wife, student, and full-time employee at an area hospital. I bust my rump daily so that my kids can have the things they need. I chose a non-traditional path to success, and I am dealing with the consequenses of those choices. However, I can't help but wonder how different things would be if I had been born under different circumstances.
When I was born, my dad had just been hurt at work in an accident that broke his hip. He was never able to work again becuase of an infection that caused him to have several hip surgeries. He walked with a very noticeable limp my entire life. My mother worked as an apartment manager for $8.50 an hour, which at the time was decent money. However, we struggled in a lot of ways. We lived in a terrible neighborhood in the HUD apartments my mother managed. We could not afford private school, so in order to keep me from the awful school system where we lived, my parents gave my aunt's address and drove me 10 miles to school every day. Of course, this added to their financial strain, but my mother never ceased to tell me how important education was.
In school was where I flourished. It was where I could go to get away from the stresses of life (at 8 years old). I made straight A's, was in an accelerated program, and was told I could be anything I wanted. I had potential. Fast forward several years to high school, we moved to a new town about 60 miles away where the schools were much better and mother had gotten a better job ($9.50 an hour). I graduated with honors, made a 30 on my ACT and made plans to leave home and fulfill my potential. Then, I got a call about a month after graduation. My mom was sick. She needed me to come right away. When I arrived to the apartments where she worked, I was informed that she had died. At 18 years old, my life changed instantly. So many questions swirled in my mind, not the least of which was,
"How will I ever be able to make it?"
As a child of poverty, let me tell you that there were certainly things my parents could have done better to help me succeed. However, those things were out of my control. Even as an adult, the decisions of my parents haunt me, and I still often wonder if I will ever be able to escape the projects.
First, let me introduce myself. I am Amber Wortham Reece, a 24-year-old mother, wife, student, and full-time employee at an area hospital. I bust my rump daily so that my kids can have the things they need. I chose a non-traditional path to success, and I am dealing with the consequenses of those choices. However, I can't help but wonder how different things would be if I had been born under different circumstances.
When I was born, my dad had just been hurt at work in an accident that broke his hip. He was never able to work again becuase of an infection that caused him to have several hip surgeries. He walked with a very noticeable limp my entire life. My mother worked as an apartment manager for $8.50 an hour, which at the time was decent money. However, we struggled in a lot of ways. We lived in a terrible neighborhood in the HUD apartments my mother managed. We could not afford private school, so in order to keep me from the awful school system where we lived, my parents gave my aunt's address and drove me 10 miles to school every day. Of course, this added to their financial strain, but my mother never ceased to tell me how important education was.
In school was where I flourished. It was where I could go to get away from the stresses of life (at 8 years old). I made straight A's, was in an accelerated program, and was told I could be anything I wanted. I had potential. Fast forward several years to high school, we moved to a new town about 60 miles away where the schools were much better and mother had gotten a better job ($9.50 an hour). I graduated with honors, made a 30 on my ACT and made plans to leave home and fulfill my potential. Then, I got a call about a month after graduation. My mom was sick. She needed me to come right away. When I arrived to the apartments where she worked, I was informed that she had died. At 18 years old, my life changed instantly. So many questions swirled in my mind, not the least of which was,
"How will I ever be able to make it?"
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